What are they trying to tell me!

Why do I over analyse what people say, it's like if a person tells me a perfectly clear statement I take it as a metaphor. I don't stop there, no that would be too easy. Instead I begin to deconstruct it, finding multiple solutions. Then I separate them with an 'and ' statement making it clear there is no union between the multitude of resolutions. I finish this process up by plugging in the potential explanations. Unfortunately I always end with the same results, I'm a fucking idiot!